The Gym Doesn’t Belong at Dinner….

And other thoughts about the types of outfits I see guys wearing everyday, all over town, that are just plain unacceptable.

*This is a guest post by Kyle Kaepernick special to CandyBarbie.com

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     Today after work I went to pick up dinner.  And although it was only take-out, something struck me out of the corner of my eye that just got me thinking.  And thinking.  And thinking.

      What I happened to see was a guy somewhere in his late 20′s or early 30′s sitting there in a baseball cap turned backwards, a t-shirt with the sleeves ripped off (and the rip continued all the way down to his waist), a pair of athletic shorts, and some sneakers.  Now possibly this guy’s look could be excused by convincing myself that he was just stopping in for some food on his way home from the gym or the courts.  But what can’t be excused, gym or not, was the big full scruffy scraggly beard that this guy was sporting.

 

Ben Affleck keeps his beard neatly trimmed

 

     Now I just don’t get this.  The beard thing.  What girl or gay man finds this look attractive?  I see more and more young guys all the time growing these sorts of beards out.  Why?  I’m not talking the nicely groomed and manicured sort of beard you may see a business man wear.  I’m talking the Castro style, hair goes everywhere, something’s nesting in their beard.

     As for as the wife beater, athletic shorts, and sneakers?  Yeah I doubt that guy was coming back from the gym.  It’s a look I see WAY TOO OFTEN all over town.  And even if you were going to the gym: take a gym bag, show yourself off, and change your clothes.  Just make a little effort.  Is it really that hard?  Is it really that terrible to take the extra few minutes to clean yourself up?

.    To help guys out (because maybe they just don’t know) I’m going to make a short little punch-list of clothes that men like to wear along with the acceptable and unacceptable places they may be worn:

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#1: Sports Jerseys: Seems like just about every guy loves their team whether it’s football, baseball, basketball, hockey, soccer, rugby, etc.  And to show that love they have to own their teams best players replica jersey.  But as proud as you are of your team, the jersey isn’t appropriate everywhere.

 

This is what most guys look like wearing a jersey. Kevin Smith is a cool dude, but there’s nothing “dreamy” about him.

 

Where to wear them: The game to show your fandom.  The court or field while you’re playing with your teammates.  In your house at your party you are throwing for the big game.

Where not to wear them:  The mall.  Out for dinner.  A job interview.  To the movie theater.  On vacation.  On a date.  To your kid’s school play.  When out for drinks with friends (unless a sports bar to watch the game)

Extra Tip: Don’t wear a basketball jersey (tank top) with jeans.

 

#2: Rubber Nike/Addidas/Reebok Sandals: You know the ones.  They look a little like flip-flops but have the one flap (sometimes it’s Velcro) instead of the thong between the toe.

Where to wear them: Down to the mail box.  Around your house.  In the gym locker room.

Where not to wear them: Anywhere not listed above, especially in restaurants or on airplanes.

Extra Tip: Don’t pair with socks.

 

#3: Athletic Shorts: The standard mesh or nylon material that all guys wear.

Where to wear them: The gym.  The court or field.  For a jog.  Around the house.

Where not to wear them: Shopping at the mall.  Out to dinner.  On a date.  On vacation.

 

#4: Sneakers: So many guys love their sneakers.  When you’re younger it’s what Jordan’s or LeBron’s you own.  When older it’s a comfortable pair of New Balance.  And sneakers are ok in a lot of situations.  Just not every situation.

Where to wear them: The gym.  The court or field.  For a jog.  Around the house.  For a walk.  Doing “sight-seeing” touristy things when on vacation.

Where not to wear them: A nice dinner.  A nightclub.  Church.  A job interview.  A date.

 

Jerry’s Suit looks great. Jerry’s date looks great. Jerry’s feet…doh!

 

 

#5: T-Shirts: Every guy loves T-shirts.  And they are acceptable in almost every situation.  With the exception of a very small few.  But more importantly is the “style” of T-shirt.

Where to wear them: Almost anywhere.

Where not to wear them: Church.  A job interview.  A nightclub.

Extra Tip: The more “stuff” the t-shirt has on it, the more gaudy it probably is.  Just because it’s expensive doesn’t mean it’s good.  Ed Hardy, Affliction, etc are NOT ok for the clubs.  No matter how many rhinestones or jewels are on it.  In fact, unless you’re stepping in the octagon, they aren’t ok period.

 

.    I know a lot of guys won’t read this.  And I know a lot who do won’t listen.  Some will even think badly of me.  But if I can help just one guy from being a giant doucher and maybe even pick up a lady friend then it’s all worth it.

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2 Comments

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2 Responses to The Gym Doesn’t Belong at Dinner….

  1. Sneakers and suits is just a big no no. Unless maybe they’re like the 80′s Miami Vice type things. Then again……

    I do like my t-shirts, and I have been known to wear my Ted Baker plain white v-neck with a little black Ted Baker written across the middle with a suit. I don’t like ties is my excuse. Shoes are where I let the side down. I love comfy shoes, hate buying new ones, so I usually have two pairs of shoes, one pair black, one pair brown that I wear until they fall off my feet. They end up looking tired and very scruffy, bit like an old dog.

  2. Kyle

    Thanks for commenting!

    I wear a ton of t-shirts myself. It sounds like if you are going with a plain t-shirt with small writing on it then you’re good to go. I hate the ones that have a huge tiger or dragon with 20 jewels and cursive writing all around them.

    The sneakers I’m talking about are the Jordans or Air Force Ones or LeBrons that are huge and clunky and all sorts of neon colors and crap. I don’t like those anywhere but on the court.

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